August
←Back to
July
The UAW has filed federal labor charges against disgraced billionaires Donald Trump and Elon Musk for their illegal attempts to threaten and intimidate workers who stand up for themselves by engaging in protected concerted activity, such as strikes.
After significant technical delays on X, formerly known as Twitter, Trump and Musk had a rambling, disorganized conversation on Monday evening in front of over one million listeners in which they advocated for the illegal firing of striking workers.
"I mean, I look at what you do," Trump told Musk. "You walk in, you say, You want to quit? They go on strike, I won't mention the name of the company, but they go on strike and you say, That's OK, you're all gone. You're all gone. So, every one of you is gone."
Under federal law, workers cannot be fired for going on strike, and threatening to do so is illegal under the National Labor Relations Act.
"When we say Donald Trump is a scab, this is what we mean. When we say Trump stands against everything our union stands for, this is what we mean," said UAW President Shawn Fain. "Donald Trump will always side against workers standing up for themselves, and he will always side with billionaires like Elon Musk, who is contributing $45 million a month to a Super PAC to get him elected. Both Trump and Musk want working class people to sit down and shut up, and they laugh about it openly. It's disgusting, illegal, and totally predictable from these two clowns."
But what do you expect from a couple of damned Nazis?
King Pinocchio The Lion further enrages Black Journalists
After the king enraged the Black journalists at a speech to them, it turns out that (gasp! How can it be??) Donald Trump... how shall I put this? Fibbed?
No, he lied through his damned teeth when he accused the journalist's association of incompetence and equipment problems as the cause of the delay.
The truth was, he was arguing with them about fact-checking.
Honest people hate lies and love fact checking.
Thieving liars hate fact checks.
08/01/2024
Vice Presidance Harmiss officially declared Dumbocratic presidential candidate
It's now official. The thirty four time convicted felon will now face off against former federal prosecutor Kamala Harmhim.
Pity the felonious king.
08/03/2024
King Donald the Cowardly felon fears debating Federal Prosecutor Kamala
Having already set up a debate on the ABC TV network before the Biden campaign crashed and burned when the king was all ready to debate an even more elderly politician than himself, the thirty four time convicted felon is now saying he won't show up, instead wanting a rigged "debate" on Faux News that the federal peosecutor has not agreed to.
What a cowardly wimp the king is. One must pity a "man" with such a weak, if existing, backbone.
08/04/2024
Walzing with Matilda
Who? Google it, you snotnosed kid!
King Donald the Ancient promised to build walls, and didn't. Illegal immigration is shockingly down (shockingly to the king) under the other old man, President Brandon, despite the king's efforts to make the "woke liberal dems" look bad, what with all the illegal space aliens sneaking in through the Mexican border.
Kamala Nominated Walz! Take that, King Donnie!
08/06/2024
Uke rain attacks Rush Yeah
Bombs rained on the Rushin' homeland yesterday close to Uke Reign's northeastern border, where things have been pretty peaceful, considering they live by the border of two countries at war with each other.
"No fair!" Rushin' President Putitin complained. "The fighting's supposed to be in your country, not ours! Who's invading whom?" He said, uncharacteristically grammitical for a foreigner, since we don't know our own damned language. Huh? Sorry, I... ahem...
He then slunk off, still bitching about not ruling the world.
08/08/2024
Jefferson Davis Vance tries to swiftboat The Wall
The Nazipublican vice presiduncial non-mommie yesterday accused Dimocratic vice present dance candy date "Wally" Walzz of ducking military service after Waltz had served the military for twenty two years, accusing the two term governor of retiring to avoid service in Ire Rack, despite Governor Walls having retired months before orders to Ire Rack were issued, so he could run for con guess.
"Wally knows this guy from ten million years in the future who warned him to retire," Jeff Vance said, not knowing that we were cognizant of what JD stood for. Or what "cognizant" means.
08/09/2024
King Clarence the Cowardly Lyin' decides to debate the federal prosecutor, after all.
King Donald the Dim, after saying in effect he was afraid of facing a federal prosecutor after being convicted of thirty four felonies, was apparently goaded into accepting the ABC debate. By whom we have no clue, but the fight is on.
08/09/2024
Correction
Wallzie served 24 years in the military, not 22.
08/10/2024
Is Roger in trouble again?
He knocked on the boss' door holding a stack of papers... wait, the door wasn't holding the papers, he was. That's not like Roger at all, he does everything on a compuuter. I wasn't sure he knew how to use a pencil.
Anyway, twenty minutes later these guys came in looking like movie spies; black suits, sunglasses and all. They left twenty minutes later.
Five minutes after that, the boss came out, looking decidedly unwell. "I'm taking the afternoon off," he said. "Hold down the fort."
We're not sure what to do. Should we go into the boss' office and look for Roger?
They're still arguing.
08/12/2024
Update:
Sharon, the intern, was the only one brave enough to go in the boss' office. Then she yelled "come here and help!"
We all filed in... he can't fire ALL of us, and there was Roger on the floor. Sharon said "somebody help me get him on the couch. I called 911 already."
Just then Roger came to. "What happened? Where am I?"
Bertha, an editor, "said you were talking to the boss and these guys in black suits came in and..."
"Oh, yeah. That's the last thing I remember. Where are the documents?"
"What documents?"
"The emails I printed to show the boss. King Donald's Rethuglican party's email account was hacked. I didn't do it!" Just then the phone rang, and I answered it. It was the boss. We finished the conversation and hung up.
"Relax, Roger," I said. "Those guys in the suits were feds. They were going to arrest you for hacking the Republican't party's email account, but you passed out as soon as you saw the feds, who looked at the emails, asked a bunch of questions, and left. The boss said they called him and said not to tell anybody, but it was the Iranians who hacked King Donald's account. They're going to talk to Roger, the email was addressed to him."
Just then we heard sirens, and Roger passed out agan. The siren was an ambulance for Roger.
I hope he's not out long, our computers fuck up a lot. Roger says it's mostly PEBCAK. He wouldn't tell me what that meant.
08/12/2024
Union sues King Donald and Prince Elon for illegal union busting.
In a sentimntal billionaire to billionaire talk between King Donald the stupid and Prince Elon the Dim, the king praised the prince for union-busting at Tesla.
It's a federal felony. Not that the thirty four time felon gives a rat's ass about the law or the Constitution.
Here is the response from the UAW:
08/15/2024
American mainstream media's calculators hacked
Roger doesn't need to worry about this one, he's been in the hospital getting a stent for the heart attack the FBI triggered a few days ago. Our computers were unworkable until he came back to work. The boss said he's going to dock him, as well as cheering the king and prince's stance on unions.
Europe's DW News in Germany and the BBC in Great Britain report that the Ukranian army has taken 1,000 square kilometers of Russian land. American news says "almost 400 square miles."
A kilometer is six tenths of a mile (3/5), a square kilometer is six tenths of a square mile. A thousand kilometers is six hundred miles. A thousand square kilometers is six hundred square miles.
Or was it their calculators and not their incompetent math teachers? I suspect rather than multiplying a thousand by six tenths, they divided, although the answer is just a different kind of wrong, that comes out to less than two.
Or did the first one to report it pull that number out of their ass and the rest copied it, knowing that the other Americans are just as ignorant, apathetic, and stupid as them?
08/15/2024
King Dumbald's rich kid sense of entitlement shines forth
In a campaign speech yesterday where he was supposed to be talking about the economy, he stated that he was "entitled" to attack The Prosecutor because she called him and Jadey Vance "Wierd".
Not understanding the difference between fact and fiction, or the meaning of common words, The Dumbald can't inderstand that fewer than one percent of Americans are as rich as him and the wierdo Nazi Elon Musky. Being in a group that comprises less than one percent is the definition of wierd.
Being a Nazi in the twenty first century is also wierd. But the fact that he's a Fascist explains why he thinks the centrist Harris is a "far left extremist."
08/16/2024
Meanstream media continues lying about inflation and price gouging
From the Washington Post to Fox News, all the meanstorm media outlets continue to deny that price gouging contributes to inflation, A Trumpesque lie that goes against the evidence consumers can see with their own eyes.
An example is beer prices in bars in Springfield (choose your favorite Springfield, almost every state has one). As soon as the covid restrictions closing businesses ended, the beer distributors raised the price of a twenty four count case of beer by two dollars. This was before the Ukraine war raised oil prices, before supply chain glitches hit. There was no apparent reason for the price hike.
$2 divided by 24 is a little less than nine cents per beer. All of the taverns in town raised the price of a $2.50 beer by half a dollar.
Price gouging doesn't cause inflation, it simply lets sellers take advantage of the inflation to enrich themselves, making it worse for normal people and prolonging the inflation. Inflation is a boon to the rich, who will raise prices every chance the market gives them an excuse to. They think we're stupid. Note, the rich own the meanstream media.
08/18/2024
Roger gets out of jail
Last Tuesday, just as our computer systems started to get flaky, the Florida Bureau of Investigation burst into the offices with their guns drawn. Odd, since our offices are in Indiana.
One of their guns went off.
"Oops," the cop said. Luckily, the bullet went through a window. The only injury was to a large bird that was rushed to a vetrenary hospital, a red tailed hawk, similar to the one pictured here doing its impersonation of King Dumbold ducking the bullet that almost blew his head off.
They handcuffed Roger and dragged him off. He was released late yesterday afternoon without charge or explanation.
Roger said that it looked like the Boss' computer was the first one affected, a trojan e-mail roger called "fishing". We have no idea what fish or Troy has to do with computers.
Roger went home to get some sleep. The police laughed when we reported the computer break-in.
"That's what you get for saying mean things about rich people," an unnamed officer told Betty "off the record". Betty is an editor.
08/24/2024
Spoiler with a dead worm in his brain supports King Donald the Lyin' Hearted
Bobby Pin Kennedy Junior, son of the late Senator who was never on time for anything, yesterday suspended his campaign to spoil President Bite'em's chances for re-election, yesterday announcing that due to his rich suporters suspending cash payments to the also rich Kennedy, he was ending his candidacy and throwing his support behind King Donald the Fraudster.
"Well," he said, "the same people who gave me money to spoil Joe's chances to be re-elected are paying the king. And the worm didn't make me say that! Dead worms don't rat on their friends!"
He then wandered off aimlessly, talking to himself.
In other Nooze, the Dimocrats held their nomination, and nominationed Vice Presid aunt Camera Harris, and the Nooze hired its first Asian writer, ME! Now I have to go wash the boss' clothes...
08/24/2024
Boing!'s incompetence and apathy strands astronauts
NASA has discovered that Boing!'s products are worthless junk, and will send the defective Boing! space capsule back to Earth without endangering any astronauts in its dangerous, over budget, late capsule. Boing! says "Hey, it's as safe as our airplanes! Except maybe the two that crashed, and the ones that had parts fall off in flight."
Boing! has sentimentally brought back the old aviation adage "any landing that doesn't kill you is a good landing" from the early days of aviation.
The astronauts were supposed to be home months ago, and are stuck on the ISS until February, when they will ride a Space-X Nazirocket back.
08/26/2024
King Donald the Felon indicted again
A second Grand Jury has said that the king must stand trial for trying to steal the 2020 presidential election.
The prosecutors are leaving out any felonies committed in his official duties, only ones he committed as candidate. The Supremes had said that he was not liable for crimes and atrocities committed as part of his official duties, and trying to overthrow the government isn't a presidential duty.
In other Royal Flushed Nooze, Trump's staff engaged in a "shouting and pushing match" when the rich, entitled, eighty year old toddler's staff tried to push their way past Arlington Cemetary's staff to photograph parts of the cemetary that are off limits to anyone but cemetary staff.
"I'm the fucking KING!" The Donald screamed before shitting his adult diaper, like non-potty trained toddlers often do.
The king has repeatedly shown his disrespect, even disgust of military people, especially those who are killed or captured, and the "gold star" families who have lost a child or spouse to the violence of war.
The king was a draft dodger furing Vietnam. Fools think him patriotic.
08/28/2024
Greedy billionaires strive to fuck you over even worse
Their greed knows no bounds. Their Fascist Project 2025 handbook for the next Fascist president (they're rooting for the king) aims to do away with overtime, By federal statute.
The evil scheme entails paying workers bi-weekly or monthly, with overtime being only over 80 hours in a two week period rather than over eight houirs in a single shift.
The next Great Depression is coming. The greedy rich guarantee it. As in 1928, when normal people can't afford the overpriced shit the super-rich sell, depression hits.
08/29/2024
Billion dollar food company kills 9, hospitalizes 57
The disgustingly filthy Boar's Head meat factory has poisened hundreds of people, hospitalizing fifty seven and killing nine. Records show dozens of violations for black mold, mildew, cobwebs, insects, the smell of vomit, and poor people.
No one was jailed for negligent manslaughter, of course. Federal law forbids incarcerating the rich. No? Then why aren't Boar's Head's CEO and Board of Directors in jail? Why doesn't a SINGLE violation shut a food company down?
08/31/2024
September
Share this with your Facebook friends if you're not afraid of Farsebook jail